I see you've taken a more archaic tone with this one, probably given the elven main characters. This makes a lot of sense in the dialogue portions, but I'm not so sure about the narrated/descriptive parts. To be honest, it's a matter of subjectivity and taste, but I feel like it's a tad stacatto right now.
There isn't much else to critique, the story - or microfiction or scene - has a satisfying climax and leads into the promise of more story, which is fun.
One small thing is that at the very end we're told that Lorien knows something, but as readers we aren't really told or shown why. It feels a little like then narrator is insisting on something without making us privy to it, which is a bit of a letdown. This doesn't require a huge change, but perhaps a line or two about what Lorien's indicators tell him - but still keep it suitably poetic to fit with the overall style and feel of the story.