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Author Topic: Kill the above Poster game  (Read 264097 times)

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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9900 on: September 24, 2011, 12:15:15 AM »
orly.

As you frolic (joyously/mindlessly - take your pick) around on the aftermath of this grossly deed, you get noticed, surrepticiously creeped on and suddenly ensnared by the dreadful (and ever watchful) Tentacular Mailbox of Doomtm.
Binded and hoisted up, feet first, you are fed, slice after slice [CLACK-CLACK-CLACK] unto the creature's guillotine maw, square bite after square bite [CLACK-CLACK-CLACK], quarter of an inch after quarter of an inch [CLACK-CLACK-CLACK], until there's nothing left of the monkey, except maybe some sad smears on the mighty mailbox [GULP-AAAaaahhh...]

But LO and BEHOLD! For your worthless self isn't (quite) sacrificed in vain, for thousand of corrupted meaty slices are sent all over the wide world, sealed and stamped letters of uncanny deceases, and thus Nurgle is pleased, and sent forth is Whory PedoSanct, to hump all of your untoward remains and bring the corruption back into the fold, which it should never have left in the first place (or second, or third even) to be pimped for eternity to some random and psychologically deviant chaos cultists.

YES. Justice. At last.

   Starky

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Offline Sanctjud, Holder of the Gold Medal in Pedolypics.

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9901 on: September 24, 2011, 03:25:28 PM »
Your brain explodes from the fact that someone has discovered you have been watching enough hentai to come up with that kind of death for me.

I also hack out your spine with a screw driver because the PP boards are down... :-(
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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9902 on: September 24, 2011, 03:46:10 PM »
Hentai has nothing to do with tentacles. Really.  ::)

Oh, look! As unlikely for it to happens, we just managed to fit a whole ironing board down your throat! WOW!

A bit messy I admit and its too bad that you can't quite talk around it for some witty comment, but ohwell, it may be worth a pic, right?

   Starky

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Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9903 on: October 10, 2011, 07:47:03 PM »
I eat an iron, along with week-old spagetti sauce (my weakness). A moment later a gurgling bowel is your only warning before I fire an iron at you using my... improvised grey-water cannon. The iron cracks your skull, while the poo leaks into the wound for good measure. The filth causes a massive, unnatural infection which festers out of control. Your head inflates like a puss-filled balloon and then finally explodes. I eat your Eldar.
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

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Offline Admiral Dred

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9904 on: October 11, 2011, 09:33:28 PM »
Millions of tiny balloons are implanted into Jawmonkeys pox ridden hide.  They slowly inflate.  With each passing moment, Jawmonkey vomits and spasms uncontrollably, yearning for freedom.  But it has only begun.

As they inflate, it pushes the pestilent skin outwards.  Thousands of blisters appear, and living in a Monkey infested environment, feces leak in.  The blisters pop one by one, forcing the sodden skin to let in the viscous infectious waste.  Jawmonkey becomes a walking biohazard.  Cities evacuate, nukes drop.  Eventually, the floods of pus and blood drown Jawmonkey.  He dies slowly, due to his implants he suffered as a child.  He takes in every gurgling breath, flushing out more blood and essential liquids, slight oxygen reaching his lungs.  He starts killing monkeys, opening up their lungs with a small incision, and drinking the precious air.  The balloons in his eyelids finally pop, turning his eyelids into gently swaying flaps of eye string and dried blood.  His pupils fall out, leaving a cavity in his eyes, which he replaces.

After nine days, however he emerges victorious.  He walks out into a wrecked city.

Then gets hit by a car  :P
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Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9905 on: October 11, 2011, 11:39:19 PM »
The car propels the Monkey like a Feces-coated arrow. He howls through the sky, spattering poo on the unfortunates he passes overhead.
"ARROOOOoooooooooooo!"
You only have time to half scream before the Monkey drills through you and splats on the wall behind you.
"OH SHNIKIE-" [POOM-Spitch!]
You have just enough time to look behind you through the impossibly large hole in your torso at the Monkey sliding down the wall, leaving a chili rainbow as he makes his digusting descent.
[sssssssssplut]
You finally lose conciousness and fall like a stiff board directly backwards... and into the frothy filth puddle of the Monkey.
[Splish!]
The hole in your belly allows the formation of brown bubbles to waft through the air for a short time.
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9906 on: October 12, 2011, 01:03:53 PM »
And now for something different: You get tied down in some remote cabin and fed every day, so not to die from starvation. Wird in itself since there is given no explanation as for the whyes... However, the interesting part come in - You are handed out as a living meal to a single ant.

ONE ant.

It takes a bloody while.

   Starky

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Offline Facultas

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9907 on: October 12, 2011, 05:44:46 PM »
Except, your body regrows faster than the ant can eat you, eventually Starky goes more insane than he currently is and begins to eat the victim himself. A few days later he realizes that he has salmanella from ant eaten meat, and dies a relatively quick death. The ant once more begins to feast.

Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9908 on: October 12, 2011, 06:36:57 PM »
I eat you until I vomit all over your chewed on carcass. Then I lap up the vomit, chew a bit more, vomit. I repeat this cycle for quite some time until devoured.

I smash the ant.
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9909 on: October 12, 2011, 07:37:22 PM »
But you then catch some uncanny decease from Faculty's corpse and rot inside out in a matter of hours. See what happens when one lives a dissolute life...

   Starky

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Offline Admiral Dred

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9910 on: October 12, 2011, 07:38:59 PM »
Whoa, whoa whoa. 

The ant didnt have any part of this!

Jawmonkey was simply HANDED to the ant.

Maybe it was against the ants will?  Maybe an ant torturer was watching and occasionally whipping the ant with a little Warhammer model whip?

Now he is dead.  Poor little guy. 

Karma walks up to Jawmonkey, puts four massive gashes through his face with a dirty knife, kicks him to the ground and proceeds vacuum out the insides of his head through his nostrils.


 EDIT 

LolDeer appeared as I was writing this.  He dies from drinking rotten milk.  8)

But Jawmonkey still suffers his fate for murdering an innocent ant!  :P
« Last Edit: October 12, 2011, 07:41:05 PM by Admiral Dred »
Sense just doesn't make sense, if you just happen to make sense of it all.
I use Calgar as terrain/objective.   8)
I'm only missing 4 teeth so I should be doing fairly well in Ork World.
When in doubt, C4. --- Jamie Hyneman

Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9911 on: October 12, 2011, 07:41:33 PM »
Oh, very, VERY nice kill there. :)

WE can never kill enough of the monkey, right?

But then you enjoy it very much, right? Maybe too much. You choke to death laughing your arse out.

Ahem. LOL.

   Starky

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Yes you are being dense.

Offline Admiral Dred

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9912 on: October 12, 2011, 07:47:54 PM »
 
Oh, very, VERY nice kill there. :)

WE can never kill enough of the monkey, right?

But then you enjoy it very much, right? Maybe too much. You choke to death laughing your arse out.

Ahem. LOL.

   Starky

...

That IS the best comment. 

...

You walk into the Evil Dead cabin, and the very deer on your avatar stretches its neck out, impossibly long in fact, and chomps your head off, but not TOO far down the neck, so it can suck up your neck tubes as it cackles endlessly.  Ash laughs.  :o

Thats right, Bruce Campbell traveled time as Ash to witness your pitiful death.  8)
Sense just doesn't make sense, if you just happen to make sense of it all.
I use Calgar as terrain/objective.   8)
I'm only missing 4 teeth so I should be doing fairly well in Ork World.
When in doubt, C4. --- Jamie Hyneman

Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9913 on: October 12, 2011, 08:57:45 PM »
Guess this movie

I strap a lawnmower to my chest and chase you around the massive entry room of a mansion. You slip on the guts and gore of previous victims. It slows you down just enough for me to chatch up to you. I bear down onto you with my gore-spattering lawnmower. You stick out your hands but it doesn't slow the machine. I bathe in your ichor and spray the rest all over the walls.
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9914 on: October 13, 2011, 07:21:51 AM »
HA!

Zombie ichor is, in fact, infectious. After you're done and having a snack at the family table, your ear fall off in your soup, adding necessary proteins after your hard work. Then its your nose. Eyes. Fingers. Then you swallow your teeth as if it was popcorn.

These dreadful body parts congregates in your distended belly, mixing with corrupted stomach fluids and grow up into a hungry evereating spawn, devouring you inside out in the slowest and most despicable agony you can imagine. Ending up clawing its way up through your liver in an orgy of LOLGURGLES.

   Starky
« Last Edit: October 13, 2011, 07:24:24 AM by Starrakatt, LolDeer of Doom »

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Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9915 on: October 13, 2011, 03:02:05 PM »
You didn't say which movie it was...

A Sumatran Rat Monkey bites your finger, you slowly turn into a zombie.
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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9916 on: October 13, 2011, 03:35:42 PM »
Do I really need to write the movie's title? I think we both know what it is... ;)

By the Powerz of the Internetz, I summon a kickboxing priest of ass kicking powers, who rip off your legs, arms and head with a few well placed roundhouse kicks.

   Starky

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Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9917 on: October 13, 2011, 05:03:34 PM »
hmmm...

I punch you a hundred times, blindingly fast; your head swells and explodes. (same movie?)
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

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Offline Starrakatt

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9918 on: October 14, 2011, 06:06:51 AM »
I don't remember having seen that in Braindead...  ???

I open up your skull with a circular saw and spoon feed your brain to some starving monkeys. Now, that is being useful for ya. :P

   Starky

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Offline jawmonkey

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Re: Kill the above Poster game
« Reply #9919 on: October 14, 2011, 09:19:49 AM »
For some reason I was thinking fist of the north star... uh,this one is Red Dragon? And here's one that I'll be amazed if you ever get.

I take you on vacation to an old southern plantation and convince you to go sight seeing. While walking around you fall into a massive pit of ravenous earth worms who slowly devour/drown you in their numbers.
Throwing feces in the eye of insolence.

Check out my terrain tutorial!, New chapter; plasticard watch tower added 11-6-11!

Also,examples of my many armies;  pics of all sorts of huge commissions

 


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