I feel like you are missing out on the BEST unit in the BT codex: Assault Terminators, you could easily fit them in by dropping the Command Squad and Marshall, and dropping some of the Neophytes. Im thinking something like this
HQ
Emperor's Champion - 140
-Accept any challenge no matter the odds
Elites
Assault Terminator Squad with 2 TH/ 3 LC FC-215
LRC-265
TROOPS
10x Initiates - 195
1x Neo
-Bolt pistols/CCW
-Meltagun
-Power Fist
LRC-265
10x Initiates - 195
1x Neo
-Meltagun
-Power Fist
-Bolt pistols/CCW
LRC-265
10x Initiates - 195
1x Neo
-Meltagun
-Power Fist
-Bolt pistols/CCW
-LRC-265
This should still give you the Powerful HQ unit (because the EC rides with the Termies, and whie they Technically arent HQ, i would love to see your opponent try to tell you otherwise.
You also now have 4 LRC's, so your opponent literally cannot stop that from reaching him.
This also gives you some Powerfists to help you hit Dreadnaughts or tough marines (like GK) and still gives you a neo in each squad to die first.
I find Marshalls and Castellans are just too pricy, when for just a few points more, you can bring an Assault Terminator Squad.
Imagine the look on your opponents face when you put 4 LRC's on the table, priceless... i might have to make this my 2k and try it out (bye Vindicators
)
It would look something like this!
Rad Pic BTW