The Vaults of Kekes'tular: Orks Vs Tzeentch Daemons, 1000 pointsThe best part of being Big Nob Hob was getting to feel the thunder in his chest every time the Mek Gunz fired. He and his boyz squatted on a low ridge next to a big battery of the fat-muzzled artillery, watching the weedy grots oil this and ratchet that and then, all of a sudden, one mad little grot pulled a lever and FOOOM--a great big bang and a whizz-bang black parabola of smoke ended in another super kaboom somewhere far away.
Sometimes they even hit the stuff they were aiming at.
"Ah." He said, lighting a fat squig-cigar on the red hot muzzle of the nearest gun. "This is the life, eh, Wort?"
Wort shrugged and, just for fun, caught a grot by the leg and tossed him into the barrel of one of the lobbas just before it fired. The grot, somehow, made it out alive. This seemed to disappoint Wort. "It's not bad."
"Not bad? NOT BAD?" Hob got up and fumbled with his shoota. "Dis here battery is the most fun I've had EVER!"
Wort stood up and pointed his shoota at Hob. "NO! THE MOST FUN I EVER HAD WAS THE TIME I KRUMPED THAT GIANT DISC WOT-NOT!"
"GUNZ!" Hob roared, firing a burst into the air.
"WOT-NOT!" Wort responded, leveling his gun at Hob's chin.
The other nobz sat down to watch the fight and started betting teeth on the winner when, to everyone's surprise, the thunder of the guns was drowned out by something...else.
It was a howl. The mournful, bloody wail of something...unnatur al. Several somethings, actually--several large, hungry, *violent* somethings. And they were coming for him. Of that he had no doubt.
For the first time in a long, long time, Big Nob Hob felt just a little...well...sca red.
He laughed and slapped his big-horned helmet on his head. "Ho-ho, Wort me lad--fings have just got interestin', eh?"
Wort laughed and put on his helmet, too. "Oy, I hope they got big teeth. Still owe the mek for this shiny shoota."
Hob nodded, going through his own debts with some crude arithmetic that added up to the highest number Hob knew: Lotz. He slapped his old mate Wort on the shoulder. "I told yer the gunz was the best place to be!"This battle is the continuation of the Ork portion of the ongoing campaign me and a few friends have going. Read about this set of missions
here. Basically, the orks are headed north to try and pick some fights with Khorne rather than sneaky, weedy Tzeentch. Today, they need to do enough damage to my daemonic forces to secure their supply lines. Here are the lists:
Boss Naz-Finga's RearguardOrk Combined Arms Detachment Warboss w/Eavy Armor, Headwoppa's Killchoppa, Bosspole (Warlord Trait: Bellowing Tyrant)
12 Slugga Boyz w/Nob (Klaw, Bosspole)
--in Trukk w/Reinforced Ram
12 Slugga Boyz w/Nob (Klaw, Bosspole)
--in Trukk w/Reinforced Ram
1 Kopta w/Big Shootas
1 Kopta w/Big Shootas
1 Kopta w/Big Shootas
5 Lobbas w/4 Ammo Runts
Pile on the Pain FormationPainboy
10 Ard Boyz w/Sluggas
--in Trukk w/Reinforced Ram
5 Nobz w/WAAAGH Banner, Eavy Armor, Shootas
Deff Dred w/ 3x Klaws, Skorcha, Grot Riggers ("Francis")
The Coven of Ishlixx, Lord of ChangeChaos Daemons Combined Arms DetachmentLord of Change w/Lv 3, Impossible Cloak, Lesser Reward (Staff of Change), Warlord (Incorporeal); (Psychic Powers: Cursed Earth, Flickering Fire, Bolt of Change)
Herald, Lv 2, w/Locus of Conjuration (Powers: Flickering Fire, Summoning)
Herald, Lv 2, w/Exalted Reward (Grimoire of True Names), (Powers: Flickering Fire, Summoning)
12 Horrors (Powers: Flickering Fire, Warpflare)
12 Horrors (Powers: Flickering Fire, Tzeentch's Firestorm)
5 Screamers
Burning Chariot
Burning Chariot
Terrain, Mission, and DeploymentThe campaign called for this to be a Vanguard/Crusade mission at the edge of the jungle. Terrain featured a river in the NE alongside some ruins, a hill in the SE, a forest surrounding a waterfall in the SW, and a series of ridges in the NW. Add in a smattering of rocks, ridges, and the like, and we had plenty of cover, but very little to block LOS or slow down movement overmuch. There wound up being 5 objectives. One was at board center, one by the SE hill, one in the NE ruins, one by the SW waterfall, and one by the NW ridges - they all formed a kind of flattened X, with more objectives being clustered toward the south.
I won the roll-off, and chose to deploy in the SE, placing my less-mobile army closest to the most objectives (4 within easy walking distance). It did give the orks some decent cover for their big guns, but I wasn't going to be shooting those guys anyway (shooting artillery is a colossal waste of time). I spread out my Horrors as best as possible across my DZ and then clustered the Lord of Change, Chariots, and Screamers along the southern edge of my zone. The book herald I put with the horrors on the hill, the Conjuration herald went with the horrors in the ruins.
My opponent put his three trukks and the Dread up front in his DZ, with the Warboss, Painboy, and Ard Boyz forming a tough-to-crack center. The Lobbas went behind the ridge (obviously) and the Nobz were tasked to babysit. The three Kotpas deployed along the north and scouted pretty deep into No Man's Land, ready to flank me.
Deployment
Tzeentch DeploymentOrk DeploymentKoptas Scout!Turn 1The Orks fail to steal the initiative and so I take the first turn. The idea, basically is to have the Horrors hang back and babysit a couple objectives while the faster stuff in my army zooms forward and lays waste to the Ork backfield/disrupts his assault. Accordingly, I move the chariots, screamers, and the Lord of Change forward and the Horrors climb into the ruins as much as possible while the other Horror group daisy-chains a single Horror forward to get a firing solution on some incoming trukks.
Of course, what I failed to consider was just how royally the psychic phase could beslubber me over. I got 5 dice on top of an 11 die base for a 16 die phase. Pretty damned good, right? Well, I spared 7 dice to summon up a pack of Flesh Hounds to help secure my flank against the Koptas and the rest was meant to go into shooting powers at the incoming enemy. The Horrors tried for a Lv 2 Flickering fire on 5 dice and got it...only to have it countered by a very good Deny the Witch roll. Okay, 4 dice left. One on a Bolt of Change from the Lord of Change that only managed to glance a trukk. The last two were for a Lv 1 Flickering Fire on the Lord of Change which went off...with 4 shots. It managed to stun the Warboss Trukk, which was something, but not enough AT ALL.
Okay, so to the shooting phase. First off, the Warp Storm gave me Yhwh-condemnedED snake on a plane WARP EBB. Again. I swear, it's like EVERY SINGLE Yhwh-condemnedED GAME.
It is at this point I also remember that I forgot to use the Grimoire of True Names on anyway. amphetamine parrot amphetamine parrot amphetamine parrot.
Well, uhhh...the one Chariot goes for an undamaged Trukk and misses. Because of course. The other chariot makes up for it by hitting with some Pink Fire and blowing the southernmost Ork Trukk to smithereens, killing half the unit inside and blowing up a nob. That's something. Then, in a desperate (and rather foolish) move, I turboboosted the Screamers over the injured ork squad and killed another two guys, but then left my under-defended Screamers open to counter assault.
That's okay--they wouldn't be alone.
Top of Turn 1
Cruising ForwardFlesh Hounds on the scene!The bottom of this turn ranks as one of the worst turns I've suffered in my twenty year 40K career. First, by some feat of geometry (somebody MUST have deployed improperly or moved too far, but I'm not sure who and it was stupid of me not to check), the far Trukk unit moved up, disembarked, and somehow managed an 8 inch assault move on my Horrors (which is really, REALLY shouldn't have been shorter than 12"...hmmmm...) and, predictably enough, killed them all dead (though I did take three or four orks with me). The Deff Dred got a charge on the northern Chariot (and that one was all my fault) and crushed it dead in short order. The Nobs and remaining boyz in the backfield charged the Screamers, and though I took two boys and a nob with me on the way out, they all died (thanks Warp Ebb!). THEN the Koptas and Lobbas rained fire on my last remaining Horror unit, sniping out the Herald on two consecutive failed Look Out Sir rolls.
So, let's do the math: Screamers + Chariot + 2 Heralds + Horrors = ~500 points.
That's half my army in one turn. Good God.
Oh, right--and the Warboss and his Ard Boyz disembarked from their stunned transport.
Bottom of Turn 1
So much for that "holding the backfield" thingI don't see any reinforcements. Do you see any reinforcements?The Warboss has come out to play.Turn 2Let it never be said that Wyddr is a crybaby. I probably cursed a bit, but then I pulled on my big-boy pants and powered through. I could still win this thing, sure! I've won games with one hand tied behind my back before! Excelsior!
Okay, so first order of business was how to salvage this horror show. First, the Flesh Hounds were needed to charge those slugga boyz that were now rampaging around my DZ, so they moved into position. Next, all the Horrors I had left I tried to squeeze into the ruins--not all of them made it, but enough. The Lord of Change moved to intercept the Dreadnought. The Chariot flew atop the waterfall and planned to light the Warboss and his boyz on fire. Okay, now the psychic phase:
Down to 4 dice base (shudder) and I rolled four more for an 8 die phase. Three dice went into a Bolt of Change that knocked a hull point off the Deff Dred and blew up the empty trukk in the far north (sweet). Another three dice went to a Warpflare that hit all three Koptas and the Boyz all at Strength 4. I rolled 4 shots on the first Kopta--no damage. 5 shots on the second Kopta--no damage. 7 Shots on the third Kopta--killing it. 8 shots on the Boyz, killing only one but then melting another one into goo with Warpflame. So, in other words, a really, really amphetamine parrotty output for that power. Random Strength and Random Shot Counts are not your friends, kids. The last two dice went into Cursed Earth on the Lord of Change, making him extra-special hard to kill with a 2++ rerollable save. You all shut up now with your "cheese" complaints. Man just killed half my army. Give a guy a break, huh?
For the rest of the turn, the Chariot laid a nice Torrent on the Ard Boys, hitting 6 and killing...one. And giving them even *better* Feel No Pain. Thanks, fellas.
The Lord of Change charged the Dreadnought and rolled pretty terribly, getting just one pen for a knocked-off klaw and putting the Dredd on the ropes. The Flesh Hounds charged the Boyz and ate them all up with little trouble. You know, now that I'm here thinking about it, I probably *should* have assaulted one of the Koptas with my Horrors, but I didn't. Live and learn, I guess.
Top of Turn 2
Clash of Titans!In the bottom of the second turn, the Ard Boyz and Warboss and Painboy all charged my Lord of Change in the World's Biggest Rugby Scrum. The LoC got in a challenge with the Warboss but, again, only managed one wound ("rolling well" wasn't really in the cards for me this game). Their gigantic mountain of attacks did exactly nothing to the Incorporeal, Impossible Cloaked, Cursed-Earthed Lord of Change, and everybody stayed locked in combat. The Lobbas bombarded the Flesh Hounds, killing one, while the Nobz and remaining slugga boyz moved towards the center of the board. Both Koptas charged the Horrors, killing two but taking a wound in return. The Horrors stuck around.
Bottom of Turn 2
Everybody wants Big Bird's autographTurn 3Okay, okay--I'm not out of this yet. Him charging all his guys into combat with the Lord of Change actually did me a *ton* of favors--there is just no way they were going to chew through all his wounds so long as I kept Cursed Earth up. Furthermore, since my Horrors are locked in combat, there really isn't anything else I can cast *except* Cursed Earth, so I did with all my dice. Invincible Monster FTW!
Anyway, the Lord of Change killed the Warboss dead this turn, making him explode with the Staff of Change, which killed another one Ard Boy. All of their attacks managed one wound, I think, but otherwise everything was fine.
The Horrors, in their ongoing battle with the Koptas, did one wound to the *other* Kopta and took another casualty. The Koptas managed to Hit And Run out of combat at the end of the turn to get a charge next time.
The Flesh Hounds loped forward and tried for an easy 8 inch charge on the nobz while the Chariot positioned itself to kill the boyz. NO DICE. The Flesh Hounds flubbed their charge, even with Fleet, while the Chariot managed to flame a nob and a boy to death and then charge the last boy and the wounded nob in that squad. Two ork wounds for one chariot shouldn't be that hard to get, right? Well, color me surprised when it came to pass that my 3 Hammer of Wrath hits and 4 basic attacks only killed one stupid ork. Then the Nob turned around and power klawed my chariot into oblivion.
So, yeah. Things keep looking up.
Top of Turn 3
In the bottom of 3, the Lobbas bombarded the Flesh Hounds again, killing another one. The Koptas charged back into combat (oh, and its worth noting that every round of combat pretty much saw one Kopta pass its Fear Test and the other Kopta fail, so we started calling them "cowardly" and "brave" as shorthand). They killed all but one Horror, but that guy stuck around.
In the Main Event, the Lord of Change smashed the Deff Dredd into spare parts and took no damage from the piddling mortals hacking at its big feathery legs.
Bottom of Turn 3
Not a lot of daemons on this boardOne Horror Left (map above is a bit off)