News: No news is good news...

Login  |  Register

Author Topic: Last night I fell through the floor.  (Read 3207 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online Calamity

  • Concussor Concussed Dice | Captain
  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3055
  • Country: gb
  • Cocking up miniatures since 1998
  • Armies: Kharadron Overlords, Bloodbound, Celestial Lions
Last night I fell through the floor.
« on: August 2, 2015, 08:22:26 AM »
And that's not an enigmatic riddle or anything like that.  It's exactly what it says on the tin:



It must be a sign of things to come in this new job that I'm totally not prepared for.  :P

Offline Grizzlykin

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 846
  • Country: fr
  • Run little eldar, run! ... And KILL THEM ALL !
  • Armies: Eldars, Tau, Necrons
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #1 on: August 2, 2015, 08:53:06 AM »
Are you kidding me >< Are you hurt anywhere ? That's quite the unexpected turn of event you got there >< what kind of job are you starting ? You just got your foot throught right, you didn't got all the way in full did you?
The Grizzly's Arvandor Craftworld!

Quote from: Cavalier
ALL HAIL THE TORNADO! The legend is REBORN.

Quote from: Alienscar
The forum member so nice that even when he is MIA he still gets two votes for being the nicest member

Offline Wyddr

  • Author Eminence: Hereticus Liber Daemonica | Fio'shas Shi
  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5254
  • Country: us
    • My blog about SF/F stuff
  • Armies: Daemons, Imperial Fists, Tau, Ksons, Vostroyans
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #2 on: August 2, 2015, 10:49:08 AM »
Whoa!

What were you doing that this occurred? Were you stepping on unsupported flooring (like in an attic)?



Offline Spectral Arbor

  • Major
  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3021
  • Country: ca
  • Thanks for the help.
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #3 on: August 2, 2015, 11:00:53 AM »
If you were engaging in some kind of vigorous coitus when this happened, you can win the Internet today. Like, for real. I will share this on social media I'm not even a part of.

Though if the damage was a result of something more mundane, I'll probably just have to suggest you move someplace less back-watery.



Capitalization fixed. :)
« Last Edit: August 5, 2015, 12:07:05 PM by Spectral Arbor »

Online Calamity

  • Concussor Concussed Dice | Captain
  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3055
  • Country: gb
  • Cocking up miniatures since 1998
  • Armies: Kharadron Overlords, Bloodbound, Celestial Lions
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #4 on: August 2, 2015, 11:22:37 AM »
I'm not hurt no.  It was just my whole leg that ended up going straight through, not all of me, which still hurt at the time none the less.  I wish I could say that I was doing something cool and awesome at the time but it was only a simple trip to the bathroom.  We dug up a bit of the floor for bathroom pipework renovation and in the dark I ended up stepping on the weakened part.  I went straight through that, and then a second later, the ceiling below.

And the job is a call center job.  Taking calls from people looking to upgrade their phones at half eight in the morning. :P


Offline Spectral Arbor

  • Major
  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3021
  • Country: ca
  • Thanks for the help.
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #5 on: August 2, 2015, 11:34:44 AM »
Tangi!

The Internet was developed so that people could lie when they finished the sentence, "Last night, I was railing this hot person when..."

And while the term "Railing" is generally considered somewhat misogynistic, it's used in a gender neutral way. Oddly progressive for nerds in the early days of computerdom. Hopefully they will be forgiven because back then, Internet porn wasn't invented yet, and they had unreleased urges impeding their better choice of words.

So next time, I expect better lies from you, good Sir. It's what the Internet was made for!



Capitalization issues fixed, per Peanut's request. :)
« Last Edit: August 5, 2015, 12:06:21 PM by Spectral Arbor »

Online Calamity

  • Concussor Concussed Dice | Captain
  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3055
  • Country: gb
  • Cocking up miniatures since 1998
  • Armies: Kharadron Overlords, Bloodbound, Celestial Lions
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #6 on: August 2, 2015, 11:36:21 AM »
Yeah, I should have tried to turn this around with a well crafted lie.  :P

Offline The GrimSqueaker

  • The Badger on the Road | Staff Infection Officer | Debased Vassal Slayer | Title Barfly | XOXOXO Gossip Girl | Bent Over
  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 19053
  • Country: nz
  • From the Fourth Necromantic House
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #7 on: August 2, 2015, 02:41:47 PM »
Embrace your failure. Put a fire pole in that spot since you're already half way there.
Quote from: @TracyAuGoGO
Tact is for people who are too slow witted to be sarcastic.
Drink
Knights Tippler
Quote from: Surviving the World
If you can't make fun of something, it's probably not worth taking seriously.

You have to love the smell of science in the morning. It smells of learning.... or perhaps a gas leak.

Offline Wyldhunt

  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1447
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #8 on: August 2, 2015, 03:13:49 PM »
Don't fix the hole.  Invite friends over to spend the night, and apologize bashfully about the damage.  When they get up to use the bathroom, turn on a sound-and-light generator from below them to make them think there are aliens in your living room. 

Offline Spectral Arbor

  • Major
  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3021
  • Country: ca
  • Thanks for the help.
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #9 on: August 2, 2015, 04:05:41 PM »
Or better yet, place an unconcealed, non-functional camera pointing up through the floor. Giggle maniacally whenever someone has to go.

Or even better still, place an unconcealed, functional camera pointing up through the floor. Offer $20 if they're "willing to put on a show". Get them to sign a waiver, allowing you to post the video on the internet. Profit.

Just tell people you're poor, and just trying to pull a Zack and Miri to get out of your slummish conditions. When they say they aren't willing to cooperate, point out that you have to live in an apartment that has a hole in the floor of your bathroom, where anyone can spy on you taking a whiz.

Sell it. Turn those lemons into cold, hard, degrading cash.
« Last Edit: August 2, 2015, 04:06:57 PM by Spectral Arbor »

Offline Lonewolf

  • Cthulhu cultist, The Final Solution | Swarmlord | Staff Soap Spotter
  • Ancient
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4558
  • Country: de
  • Murdering armies since 2003 - retired since 2012
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #10 on: August 2, 2015, 04:49:10 PM »
Well at least you didnt hit the fire alarm  :P


No problem, I'll give you a 100% increase in pay effective immediately and retroactive to 1999.

Offline Grizzlykin

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 846
  • Country: fr
  • Run little eldar, run! ... And KILL THEM ALL !
  • Armies: Eldars, Tau, Necrons
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #11 on: August 2, 2015, 06:21:01 PM »
You guy's never cease to amaze me when it comes to weird idea seriously  ><
The Grizzly's Arvandor Craftworld!

Quote from: Cavalier
ALL HAIL THE TORNADO! The legend is REBORN.

Quote from: Alienscar
The forum member so nice that even when he is MIA he still gets two votes for being the nicest member

Offline Sir_Godspeed

  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2070
  • Country: no
  • "Bees. My God" was an obscure Batman quote.
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #12 on: August 4, 2015, 08:08:18 AM »
When you mentioned you went to the bathroom, I hoped you were going to say that you shat straight through the floor. As far as poop jokes go, that'd be pretty great.

Offline Mr.Peanut (Turtleproof)

  • Ride Like Lightning, Crash Like Thunder | Infinity Circuit | Pork Sword of Mod-Justice | Took the basket, nuts and lol | Good grief, ye hennie pennies
  • Ancient
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13225
  • Country: 00
  • Turtleposting At The Speed Of SHift
  • Armies: Eldar, Dark Eldar, Sigmarines, Chaos, Demons
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #13 on: August 5, 2015, 11:17:39 AM »
Spectral Arbor: capitalize Internet!  What are we, savages?  Barbarians?

Tangi: so, you can honestly say that you were laying pipe so hard that you busted right through.   :-*
You are
What you do
When it counts
     -The Masao
"Getting what you want can be dangerous.

Offline Spectral Arbor

  • Major
  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3021
  • Country: ca
  • Thanks for the help.
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #14 on: August 5, 2015, 12:09:53 PM »
Mr. Peanut has it mostly right. There's a stretching of the truth, but no actual lying, so... 8.5 / 10 Internet Award Points.

Add in a Burglar / Voyeur, and you'd be getting top marks. Perfect score for catching the voyeur through the new hole, and then continuing while being watched.

Laying pipe. I haven't heard that in years.

Online Calamity

  • Concussor Concussed Dice | Captain
  • Lazerous Penguin
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3055
  • Country: gb
  • Cocking up miniatures since 1998
  • Armies: Kharadron Overlords, Bloodbound, Celestial Lions
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #15 on: August 5, 2015, 04:38:06 PM »
Tangi: so, you can honestly say that you were laying pipe so hard that you busted right through.   :-*

Yes.  Yes I could.  8)

Offline Mr.Peanut (Turtleproof)

  • Ride Like Lightning, Crash Like Thunder | Infinity Circuit | Pork Sword of Mod-Justice | Took the basket, nuts and lol | Good grief, ye hennie pennies
  • Ancient
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13225
  • Country: 00
  • Turtleposting At The Speed Of SHift
  • Armies: Eldar, Dark Eldar, Sigmarines, Chaos, Demons
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #16 on: August 7, 2015, 10:50:50 PM »
Stretching it while you are laying the pipe is both a blessing and a curse.  It also makes public toilets even more awkward.  The water is cold.  And deep.
You are
What you do
When it counts
     -The Masao
"Getting what you want can be dangerous.

Offline Slick Samos

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 380
  • Country: gb
  • Que!!
  • Armies: Tau, Dark Angels & Salamanders
Re: Last night I fell through the floor.
« Reply #17 on: August 8, 2015, 04:21:29 PM »
You fool of a Took!

Note to future Tangi ... switch on the light!
Play more games, paint more models...

 


Powered by EzPortal