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Main => General 40k => Topic started by: Tebok on January 15, 2008, 02:25:04 AM

Title: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Tebok on January 15, 2008, 02:25:04 AM
What would you do? Where would you go?

Just remember, everything you can possibly imagine is out to kill you.  :o

I think the best bet is to settle down on some lightly populated world and stay out of everyones way.

Failing that, start slaughtering everyone I see until I become a Chaos Lord.

Failing any of the above - Suicide.

In the world of 40K Girlscouts probably have just as many daily casualties as the Imperial Guard does.  :-\


 

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 15, 2008, 02:38:50 AM
Just remember, everything you can possibly imagine is out to kill you.  :o

Not really. Ave imperator dominus, after all. You're just a random human. There's an entire galactic empire dedicated to keeping people like you alive. Depending on what world you land on, fitting into society would not necessarily be impossible. Surely you can follow along with a prayer or two?

Quote
Failing that, start slaughtering everyone I see until I become a Chaos Lord.

Because nothing could possibly go wrong with that... ::)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Tebok on January 15, 2008, 02:45:15 AM
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Because nothing could possibly go wrong with that... ::)

Yup! My plan is foolproof! I'll be the Lord of Chaos in no time!
(https://www.40konline.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffaeriewylde.com%2Fforum2%2Fimages%2Fsmiles%2Fpangel4.gif&hash=acdec3ead1dfc736716727a4d1460affd0ea3929)

Anyhow, one little slip of the toungue would land me in the hands of the Inquisition.

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 15, 2008, 02:48:17 AM
Er, blend in, I imagine.

If I was on a relatively pleasant world, I'd find some job that didn't require any special skills, or required skills that I actually possess, and start a life.

If I wasn't on a moderately pleasant word, I'd join up at the next Guard muster, and get the hell out of there. Probably die on some Emperor-forsaken rock, but hey, at least I'd see the Galaxy.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Alexander's Son on January 15, 2008, 03:55:58 AM
 I would grab a bolter and head to the nearest Marine center...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 15, 2008, 05:17:03 AM
Anyhow, one little slip of the toungue would land me in the hands of the Inquisition.

I was thinking more of the eternal torment and damnation of your immortal soul as you become a plaything in the hands of the infinitely evil and sadistic Ruinous Powers, but whatever works for you...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: nurgle5 on January 15, 2008, 06:56:44 AM
I would join up in the adepts mechainicus and tell them how to use machines. "All hail Nurgle5! the only one who can use the ship's internal toaster! :D :D"
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Benis on January 15, 2008, 06:58:23 AM
I would enjoy actually being in a world were religion works and immediately go to the closest Ecclesiarchy building to join His Most Holy Church. Serving the Emperor is probably a phenomenal experience considering how many people in this world are willing to waste their lives on serving some religion!  ;)

Otherwise trying to gain some sort of station above the press-ganged rabble on a cruiser would be really sweet although very difficult I guess. Maybe I can combine the two and become a priest on one of the ships plying the celestial shores.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Xeal on January 15, 2008, 07:31:55 AM
Join the inquistion probably, can't think of anything better than spending the rest of my life, torturing people and burning them as heretics, plus if i get high enough I get special products to extend my life for a very long time.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: malicant on January 15, 2008, 07:32:19 AM
It might be entirly possible to land on one of thouse world where the imperium is a myth.  A million world, I'm sure it would be possible to find one that would probably be quite like earth today.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 15, 2008, 07:34:30 AM
Join the inquistion probably, can't think of anything better than spending the rest of my life, torturing people and burning them as heretics, plus if i get high enough I get special products to extend my life for a very long time.

I... I don't think one joins the Inquisition. I'm fairly sure you're selected.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 15, 2008, 07:52:01 AM
The Inquisition has staff that aren't inquisitors. It would be logical enough for them to hire all those other people that keep the organisation going - secretaries, bureaucrats, legal experts, mechanics, you name it. It's safe to say they'd only select very qualified people, and there would be security measures, but they do need staff and it would make sense for people to be able to apply themselves. People can join the CIA, can they not? Chances are Xeal isn't sufficiently qualified, of course, as very few of us would be, but it ought to be hypothetically possible.

You'd be right about inquisitors, though. One doesn't volunteer to be one of those. You need to be chosen by an existing inquisitor.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 15, 2008, 07:58:13 AM
I suppose so... Although something makes me doubt the Ordo Malleus advertises in the local newspaper.

Wanted: Interrogator

Inquisitor seeks interrogator for the questioning of heretics.
Applicants should be team-players, with a fanatical sense of devotion to the God-Emperor.
Must be prepared to travel, and face down unspeakable horrors spawned from humanities darkest nightmares.
Experience a plus.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 15, 2008, 08:07:20 AM
I hardly think real world intelligence agencies do that either!

If you were, for example, a security expert with several decades experience, you might be hired by the Inquisition to help work on their giant-spiky-fortress-of-doom. There'd be an appropriate amount of paranoia, of course - getting a psyker to blank his memories of it afterwards comes to mind as a good precaution - but really, someone has to do these things.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Shiro on January 15, 2008, 08:35:40 AM
It would be logical enough for them to hire all those other people that keep the organisation going...people can join the CIA, can they not?

Not sure about the CIA exactly, but must auxiliary staff in such organisations are public servants in one form or another or civilian consultants. Naturally the applications would need to be qualified and undergo background analysis etc, but otherwise they will not be substantially different from their counterparts in the private sector. 

As for the thread topic, if I were a human then definitely sign up to join the Imperial fleet. Touring around the universe fighting aliens has a sort of undeniable allure. Alternatively, an Eldar on one of the larger craftworlds would be a nice, comfortable place to benefit from the most advanced technology of all the races.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Fugitive on January 15, 2008, 08:39:05 AM
It would depend on where in the 40k universe I found myself.

I'd probably try to keep a low profile at first. Once Im sure that Im not on a deamon world, a tyranid hive ship or in an all out war zone I would probably try to make a deacent living with as little risk as possible.

If I had to fight I would probably join an IG conscript squad an stay in the back. Hiding behind 49 other bodies seems like a good idea. Powerarmor might be better, but far harder to come by.

Joinig the inqusition would be one of the last thing I would do. Im sure they run a background chek on all their employes and I wouldn't want to explain my non excistant past to their enterogators.   
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Mad Dok Brown on January 15, 2008, 11:36:47 AM
I would spend my life traveling to the maelstrom and joining the ranks of the Chaos Squats, but die from friendly fire for being too damn tall  :D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: YuenglingDragon on January 15, 2008, 01:11:33 PM
Is amphetamine parrot myself an option?  I'd really like to amphetamine parrot myself.

Seriously, with the exception of some of the outlying worlds and agri-worlds, the Imperium seems to be a pretty beslubbered up place.  I'm too old to try to be a Space Marine (like I'd have the luck to end up on one of the .0001% of worlds where that's an option) and the Guard is a good way to get killed.

Maybe I'd try to make my way to a Tau controlled world.  The Utilitarian amphetamine parrot is dumb fluff but a damn sight better than endless toil in some Emperor forsaken hive.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Banned Solorg on January 15, 2008, 01:18:56 PM
I'd take out the Emperor with my massive psychic powers and then get humanity to bow down to me when I took over everything.  Next, I'd slaughter everyone who doubted me during my rise to power.  Finally, I'd launch this massive campaign to build a fleet the likes of which the galaxy had never seen and conquer the Tau.  With the Greater Good now serving Emperor Me, we'd take back all the worlds stolen by Chaos.  Since I'd be a much more powerful god than the Chaos Gods, I'd release all the Chaos Marines from their former master(s).  Then I'd try them for treason and dump them into the sun.

The Necrons would be next - I'd totally frag them all by forcing them to adopt Microsoft Windows Millenium as their new Operating System which I would do with a clever bait-and-switch virus/phishing scheme.  The Orks would be conquered easilly with free shipments of Fungus Beer which would first get them on my good side, then bring them under my control (the beer would be laced with Ridalin and LSD).

Oh yea, and I would have a palace made of solid gold bullion.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Drizzle on January 15, 2008, 04:14:04 PM
The Necrons would be next - I'd totally frag them all by forcing them to adopt Microsoft Windows Millenium as their new Operating System which I would do with a clever bait-and-switch virus/phishing scheme. 

Just give them vista and watch their heads explode.

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: clarkey on January 15, 2008, 04:44:17 PM
id join the nearest IG regiment, excel my self in the training, quickly rise to the ranks of Sergeant, and lead the squad to victory time and time again!! :)




Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 15, 2008, 04:59:36 PM
Quote
Seriously, with the exception of some of the outlying worlds and agri-worlds, the Imperium seems to be a pretty beslubbered up place.

A view which is held up by the doom and gloom of the main rulebook, but falls down once you take a wider view. Judging by most Black Library novels, the majority of Imperial worlds aren't too dissimilar to our own. Of course there are nuances of culture, technology could be higher to lower to a degree, and some of them appear to suffer from rampant overpopulation, but they don't seem entirely unpleasant, for all that.

The problem being, of course, that 'In the Grim Darkness of the Far Future Most of Us are Pretty Much Okay' doesn't have quite the same ring to it.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: 42 on January 15, 2008, 05:08:37 PM
Pray I end up on a schola world and train to become a commisar or work for the munitorium as a researcher or archivist.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Xeal on January 15, 2008, 05:14:06 PM
Yeah maybe I was over eager with the inquistion, prehaps I should join the Adeptus Mechanicus

I will implment a whole new GUI system, the likes of which has never been seen before, it shall be called Windows.  After its implementation and success on a small scale, my true value will be seen, after a few short years I will be made Fabricator General of Mars.

I shall keep all knowldge of how the system works my personal secret and send legions of Skitarii, to kill anyone who uses a pirate version of it.  For many years I will live in lap of luxary (as much as any cyborb more machine than man can).  While all ships and defenses will be upgraded to using windows.

Unfortantly around about half a centuury later, after my almost brilliant creation, the 14th black crusade pours forth from the cadian gate, and those little errors that creep up from time to time all add up, when a large number of our most neccersery vessels suddnly hit the blue screen of death, preventing them from not only firing, but also losing all their shields.

Afterwards, I lock my self in the deepest chamber on Mar's praying that Abaddon gets his ass there soon, before everyone outside kills me.

Thus I see three outcomes.

1) Abaddon turns up, thanks me for single handly bringing down the imperium, I swear loyalty to the Chaos GOds and get elevated to Daemonhood, spend the rest of eternity enjoying the luxaries slannesh has to offer.

2)  Abaddon turns up, is annoyed I depreived him of his greatest victory, and kills me (slowly)

3)  Abaddon is delyaed, they gain acess to my most fortfied chamber, Im excuted as a heretic.

1 in 3 chance, better odds than the lottery!
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Mr.Tanks on January 15, 2008, 07:37:55 PM
Me? I'd build myself a house just outside of an agri-village/town, join the local PDF, and spend my time as a farmer, enjoying the little pleasures in life, start a family, you know those old movies where theres a real sense of spirit, community and adventure? Like that, and thats honestly what I'd do, Until another fluff-less, pointlessly overpowered race comes from nowhere and completley devestates my 'home'-world and my regiment is completley destroyed apart from a few units, which amazingly become the Imperial Guards most famous and best trained xeno-hunting unit in the history of forever, had a campaign based around us, then slowly phased out.

Failing that, Steal me a battleship, stock up with food, fly to the tau empire, pick me up one of their hyper-drive rip-offs (they don't use the warp right?) fit it, and fudge off to the next galaxy, then come back with legions of genetically enhanced super-humans, destroy everything, and re populate the galaxy in my own vision, before, surprisingly, my neglected sons turn on me and try to kill me, crippiling me in body and then I'll sit on an over sized toilet for the next 10,000 years, which strangley jumps from end to beginning to end to middle to beginning to 3 quaters of the way along and then back again

Jeez I've just noticed how much GW fluff sucks :-[
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Russ, Gue'Vesa from the Tiny Red Dot on January 15, 2008, 08:46:32 PM
1st choice- be a vindicare assassin and shoot others from afar

2nd choice- learn drama and be good in it. everytime there is a war, can play dead and hope not to die.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Gornon on January 15, 2008, 09:55:04 PM
Quote
(they don't use the warp right?)

They use the Warp.  Rather then diving down into it like a sub (Imperial), they skip across it like tossed stones.

As for the Topic.  What I would like to be assuming I could get it and had the talents to do so?  An Inquisitor of the Ordo Xenos (Thorian with strong Amathian undercurrents) or an Imperial Guard Commander who actually cares about his men, and tries to use strategy instead of bodies to win.

What I would really most likely do?  Spend a few days dazed, then, depending on where I landed (assuming its not a Hive Undercity, Deathworld, ect), I would try to get a job as a History teacher, since thats going to be my career IRL.  In other words, get a job that matches my talents.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Dryad on January 15, 2008, 10:48:09 PM

Just give them vista and watch their heads explode.


(lol)... that's gold!



I wonder what Windows 40,000 will look like... Isn't Bill Gates a Primarch?  :D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Slasher Killkraze on January 15, 2008, 10:54:13 PM
Find myself some terminator armor as quickly as possible... ;D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Chosen40k on January 15, 2008, 10:58:45 PM
Invent a device that controls the fate of every battle hardened warrior in the vast galaxy of war.

Dice.


Also, I would buy every single book published by the Black Library and give it to Ahriman, hoping it would make him happy.


Then I would ask if they finally included the Nids in Dawn of War.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Max the Dog on January 15, 2008, 11:05:48 PM
I'd probably curl up in a ball and cry like a little girl when the hive fleet shows up.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Jehan-Reznor on January 15, 2008, 11:42:27 PM
I would become a missionary on a agri-world
teach those farm girls to love the God-emperor through me :p

otherwise i probably end up as a cult follower of slaneesh
(those gwar lyrics will come in handy  ;D)

and then
ogly the chaos spawn  :D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Siege_TF on January 16, 2008, 12:33:20 AM
Pray I end up on a schola world and train to become a commisar or work for the munitorium as a researcher or archivist.

Hey, that's what Commisar Cain wanted, and look what it got him! I tried to stat him once and had to use two sets of stats depending on whether he was attached to a squad or not: Ld7 if not in a squad (or if it was just him and Jergen), Ld10 if he was, asarmed with a Laspisotl and Mastercrafted Chainsword which is also a Personal whatchamacallit. After all, he's a Hero of the Imperium with a reputation to uphold!

And all he wanted was to serve his term in some artillery company as unremarkably as possible...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Fugitive on January 16, 2008, 01:37:46 AM
Me? I'd build myself a house just outside of an agri-village/town, join the local PDF, and spend my time as a farmer, enjoying the little pleasures in life, start a family, you know those old movies where theres a real sense of spirit, community and adventure? Like that, and thats honestly what I'd do, Until another fluff-less, pointlessly overpowered race comes from nowhere and completley devestates my 'home'-world and my regiment is completley destroyed apart from a few units, which amazingly become the Imperial Guards most famous and best trained xeno-hunting unit in the history of forever, had a campaign based around us, then slowly phased out.

Lol! :D

Yeah maybe I was over eager with the inquistion, prehaps I should join the Adeptus Mechanicus

Me too! If Im lucky the will make me into a servitor. Finnaly a totaly carefree life.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Fury on January 16, 2008, 02:00:13 AM
I'd want to be a rouge trader.

Yeah, you'd have to fly under the radar and fend for yourself, but ain't nobody tellin me what to do, in this millenium or that.

Think about it. No one would ever force you to fight for anything, you could simply get the hell out of there is something goes wrong, and as long as you don't cross the wrong folks (Chaos cults, Dark Eldar raiders, the Inquisition) you'd be fairly wealthy and well off.

Mercenary smuggler all the way.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Siege_TF on January 16, 2008, 02:35:18 AM
I thought Rogue Traders were Imperial sanctioned explorers and spreaders of His word to forgotten worlds...

Eh, that's probably up there with Inquisitors being incorruptable paragons of His virtue.
True... Enough.  ;)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 02:37:45 AM
Quote
I'd want to be a rouge trader.

Yeah, you'd have to fly under the radar and fend for yourself, but ain't nobody tellin me what to do, in this millenium or that.

Think about it. No one would ever force you to fight for anything, you could simply get the hell out of there is something goes wrong, and as long as you don't cross the wrong folks (Chaos cults, Dark Eldar raiders, the Inquisition) you'd be fairly wealthy and well off.

Mercenary smuggler all the way.

And how do you plan on getting hold of the bonds, or the noble bloodline, that you require to own a spacecraft? For that matter, how do you plan to pay for your ship? Not to mention the crew, and the goods you plan on selling.

The OP asked what would you do if you 'suddenly found yourself in the 40 universe', not 'what would you like to be in the 40k universe?'

Quote
I thought Rogue Traders were Imperial sanctioned explorers and spreaders of His word to forgotten worlds...

Eh, that's probably up there with Inquisitors being incorruptable paragons of His virtue.

Your thinking of the Explorators, I believe. The Rogue Traders are essentially a cross between pirates and merchants.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Andro Ist Keine Schwedischen on January 16, 2008, 02:46:37 AM
It's a bit of an ambigeous title.  Rogue Traders tend to be a varied bunch.  Everything from pirates and scrap merchants to trade princes and diplomats.

Personally I think I'd just commit suicide.  The 40k Universe isn't somewhere I'd want to live, to be honest.

~Andromidius
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 02:53:58 AM
It's a bit of an ambigeous title.  Rogue Traders tend to be a varied bunch.  Everything from pirates and scrap merchants to trade princes and diplomats.

Fair point, perhaps my description was a little simplistic. I think I've seen them described somewhere as the 'true nobility of the Imperium', although I forget where.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Andro Ist Keine Schwedischen on January 16, 2008, 02:56:55 AM
I seem to remember a similar comment.  Perhaps it's from Ravenor, since it focuses on Rogue Traders a fair amount?

It does make me wonder who gives out the licenses though, or if it's more of an honoury title for a successful trader.

~Andromidius
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 03:02:40 AM
Again, I recall something about requiring deeds, or bonds to own a ship, but I can't remember where I recall it from...

Quote
I seem to remember a similar comment.  Perhaps it's from Ravenor, since it focuses on Rogue Traders a fair amount?

Actually, I think it's one of the Eisenhorn novels. I'll have a flip through, see what I can find.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 16, 2008, 03:41:29 AM
I wish like... the whole world maybe changed to the 40k universe. I know the phrase "Careful what you wish for"... but, honestly, it might be fun ;D

Besides, everyone else in the world who ever took the mick outta 40k would be absolutely pwned. Us gamers would know how everything works, and everyone else would be like: "Help us! We're sorry we took the piss!" and we'd be like: "No, go join the imperial army or navy!" and they'd be like... "Wha? You're such nerds, you know this stuff!" and we could shoot them with a bolter or something ;D

And for those of us who'd read all the books and stuff would know exactly how to apply for Stormtrooper training, or become space marines... or how to worship Slaanesh or something ;D If you ask me... I think it'd be slightly fun. The sense of adventure, no?


Let the auto-censor do the work for you.  You may change your preferences to view forum posts in their uncensored form.  -Mr.Peanut
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 16, 2008, 03:45:07 AM
The OP asked what would you do if you 'suddenly found yourself in the 40 universe', not 'what would you like to be in the 40k universe?'

We are assuming, though, that we're going to find ourselves on an Imperial world. As opposed to appearing in deep space somewhere in the 40k universe and freezing to death even faster than we'd asphyxiate, which considering the size of the universe is statistically the most likely outcome. Unless we count the Warp, which is apparently just as large as the Materium, so we're left with something like a 50% chance of instantly dying as we appear in deep space, a 50% chance of instantly dying due to naked exposure to the Warp, and a negligibly small chance of landing somewhere survivable.

Assuming we do land on a habitable (and hopefully habited) world, I guess the first thing to do is pray that it's not a nightmare hellscape and that the ruling power has nothing against humans and has no particular reason to be otherwise hostile to you. Really, it's probably best to hope for an Imperial world, or possibly a Tau world depending on the human population there. It's better than landing on a daemon world and becoming a tortured Chaos slave for all eternity, landing on an Ork world and being crushed by the local boyz, or, even worse, Catachan.

Then, I suppose the next problem would be language. Chances are we don't speak the local language, due to thousands of years of lingustic drift, if we're lucky enough to land on a world inhabited by human descendants in the first place. On the other hand, I do know how to make up nonsense Latin phrases that sound non-specifically ominous, so I suppose I'm fluent in High Gothic. :D

Assuming the language problem is magically solved, though, then there's the immense culture shock. Even for the best of us, blending in may be difficult.

Quote from: Janek Sunber
And for those of us who'd read all the books and stuff would know exactly how to apply for Stormtrooper training, or become space marines... or how to worship Slaanesh or something  If you ask me... I think it'd be slightly fun. The sense of adventure, no?

Why does everyone go for Slaanesh? Worshipping Slaanesh is not fun. Remember Fulgrim?
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 03:50:12 AM
The OP asked what would you do if you 'suddenly found yourself in the 40 universe', not 'what would you like to be in the 40k universe?'

We are assuming, though, that we're going to find ourselves on an Imperial world. As opposed to appearing in deep space somewhere in the 40k universe and freezing to death even faster than we'd asphyxiate, which considering the size of the universe is statistically the most likely outcome. Unless we count the Warp, which is apparently just as large as the Materium, so we're left with something like a 50% chance of instantly dying as we appear in deep space, a 50% chance of instantly dying due to naked exposure to the Warp, and a negligibly small chance of landing somewhere survivable.

Assuming we do land on a habitable (and hopefully habited) world, I guess the first thing to do is pray that it's not a nightmare hellscape and that the ruling power has nothing against humans and has no particular reason to be otherwise hostile to you. Really, it's probably best to hope for an Imperial world, or possibly a Tau world depending on the human population there. It's better than landing on a daemon world and becoming a tortured Chaos slave for all eternity, landing on an Ork world and being crushed by the local boyz, or, even worse, Catachan.

Then, I suppose the next problem would be language. Chances are we don't speak the local language, due to thousands of years of lingustic drift, if we're lucky enough to land on a world inhabited by human descendants in the first place. On the other hand, I do know how to make up nonsense Latin phrases that sound non-specifically ominous, so I suppose I'm fluent in High Gothic. :D

Assuming the language problem is magically solved, though, then there's the immense culture shock. Even for the best of us, blending in may be difficult.

A series of fair, and well-reasoned - if long-winded - points. To which my response is:

Shut it, you.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Jehan-Reznor on January 16, 2008, 03:54:57 AM
Why does everyone go for Slaanesh? Worshipping Slaanesh is not fun. Remember Fulgrim?
But Fulgrim resisted his fate it is much easier when you go with the flow (or whipping ;D)

Like a corny quote, ressistance is futile :p

Well i guess a thru slaneesh follower would be like the marquis de sade to the power of 10, you do not want to be on the receiving end.  :o
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 16, 2008, 08:22:20 AM
I'd probably join the Imperial Army myself... Or the Tau, depending on which world I ended up on. I wonder if your qualifications would count towards anything in the 40k universe... probably not. A laptop computer would probably be considered a heretical item, or unsophisticated *shrug* (Though it's probably better than the rubbish technology the imperium employ).

Actually it wouldn't be a bad idea to try and be an Imperial Scientist, and come up with better ideas than the whole "Old technology and ancient designs will purge the unclean" school of thought.

And by the way we'd proably end up on Terra, because we're on Earth, and I don't see that changing any time soon.

...Finally, how come the Imperium have female loveslaves? (Reference to the Space Wolf Series "Wolfblade", where Rangar is looking at the fat bloke with the naked girls tending to him, and then later on, when they raid an asteroid and there's all those girls) I mean... they have a go at Slaanesh, but they're doing practically the same thing!
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Wyddr on January 16, 2008, 09:27:17 AM
Given the amount of space the occupy, I'd say odds on I'd randomly appear on some Ork world, and be promptly killed by some greenskin with a tire-iron.

Provided I showed up on an Imperial World, I'd probably go back to doing what I do now--teach composition. I'm betting I could get a job for some kind of Administratum training program for scribes and such. Doesn't matter how far in the future it is, people will still need to know how to read/write.

As for the 'joining the IG/Marines/Stormtroopers/Inquisition' bit--c'mon guys, let's be realistic here. While all of us could wind up as conscripts in some IG regiment (shudder), I seriously doubt many of us could hack the stormtroopers (unless you happen to be a solider/in great physical condition already), would be accepted by the Inquisition (we're all of us heretics), or have a chance in hell of ever, ever, ever making it as a Space Marine. Their entrance exams alone would probably kill every one of us.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 05:04:59 PM
(Though it's probably better than the rubbish technology the imperium employ).

Rubbish technology like personal laser weapons, anti-gravity technology, and interstellar travel, you mean?
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Two Blades as One, Samurai Ichirou on January 16, 2008, 05:15:46 PM
Sign up for the Space Marines, I'm still young enough (barely) to pull it off. If not that, bounty hunter.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Fury on January 16, 2008, 05:22:05 PM
I might have been wrong about the rogue trader thing. I've forgotten my fluff a bit lately. I could always hijack a ship an be a galactic outlaw. "I'm a wanted man. I'm wanted in fourteen different systems...etc..."


If I suddenly popped into the fantasy world of 40K, I would probably try to be as inconspicuous as possible. Time/reality travel and heresy might not be that far apart. Probably get a job at the plasteel factory and try to grind it out in a hive world. I'd try to find a modestly priced hab-unit, and a nice Valhallan girl to settle down with.

Come on, let us have our little fantasy. Galactic outlaw. Yeah.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: qwertypp7 on January 16, 2008, 05:27:13 PM
I think a better title for this would be "What would you do if Earth (as we know it) was actually a forgotten Imperial world and they suddenly came back to reclaim it?"

Imagine it if an Imperial battlefleet suddenly appeared in orbit above Earth and demanded our fealty to the Imperium of Man... That eliminates the possibility of people appearing randomly across the 40k universe doing whatever they want. You would be you in your life which has suddenly been swallowed by the 40k universe...

Although in answer to the original question... I would try and lie low for the rest of my life unless I turned up somewhere remotely pleasant in which case I guess I would try and build a peaceful life for myself... beslubber the Guard and the Marines. I wouldn't want to join either...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Two Blades as One, Samurai Ichirou on January 16, 2008, 05:35:39 PM
Imagine it if an Imperial battlefleet suddenly appeared in orbit above Earth and demanded our fealty to the Imperium of Man... That eliminates the possibility of people appearing randomly across the 40k universe doing whatever they want. You would be you in your life which has suddenly been swallowed by the 40k universe...

Bush would shoot at them. And they'd blow us up. Plain and simple.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 16, 2008, 06:38:57 PM
Imagine it if an Imperial battlefleet suddenly appeared in orbit above Earth and demanded our fealty to the Imperium of Man... That eliminates the possibility of people appearing randomly across the 40k universe doing whatever they want. You would be you in your life which has suddenly been swallowed by the 40k universe...

Hail to the Emperor. May the one true master of mankind bless and protect his loyal servant from the perils of the daemon, alien, and heretic. May he harden my heart against the lies of the unbelievers of this world, and fill me with sanctified disgust at the name of the xenos. May he bring understanding to those others, and reveal to all humans of this Earth the glories of his righteousness, that they may worship him and worthily revere his holy name. Let his blessed invasion fleet meet no resistance. Let us welcome our brothers from the stars with open arms and rejoice in the truth they bring us.

Also, I for one welcome our new Imperial overlords, and would like to remind them that as a trusted 40kO personality, I can be invaluable in rounding up others to toil in their underground plasma mines.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 16, 2008, 06:44:35 PM
It occurs to me that my copy of The Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer will come in very handy, should that happen.

Plenty of prayers to recite.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Minsc on January 16, 2008, 08:18:38 PM
I'd say most 40ker's that ended up in the 40kuniverse "for real", would probably quickly become high-ranked officers in the Imperial Army. Why? Becasuse we know almost anything about the 40k-universe, and most armies weakspots.

"So you're up against Eldar? Good, I know exactly what they're afraid of!"
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: The GrimSqueaker on January 16, 2008, 08:25:03 PM
I'd say most 40ker's that ended up in the 40kuniverse "for real", would probably quickly become high-ranked officers in the Imperial Army. Why? Becasuse we know almost anything about the 40k-universe, and most armies weakspots.

You mean in the same manner most 40Ker's should be high ranking officers in our own nations' armies as we know even more about our own universe and most armies weakspots? That's ignoring the fact that 40K is not a realistic simulation, and was never expected to be, of warfare.

The short answer - Bwahahahahahaha!.  :)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 16, 2008, 08:35:52 PM
"So you're up against Eldar? Good, I know exactly what they're afraid of!"

The army lists are so abstracted as to make our knowledge of them entirely useless when it comes to actual combat.

That said, there are things we'd know due to codices and such that most people would not, though this is coupled with incredible ignorance of more basic concerns, due to the codices' obvious focus. For example, we all know the Dark Angels' terrible secret. It's common knowledge. We know a lot of those things the Imperium likes to cover up, especially regarding Chaos.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Jehan-Reznor on January 16, 2008, 08:43:46 PM
Haha most of us would be rounded up by the inquisition anyway.
I know the weak points of the eldar.
How do you know so much about these Xenos filth!
Tyranids? there is no tyranid threat! don't say these disrupting thoughts to your fellowman. Common sense? those thought lead to the path of damnation!
Most people forget that the imperium is run like the USSR during stalins reign.
too much initiative and insights only gets the intentions of the inquisition.

Ah here is my card, Torquemada from the inquisition, i have heard so much about you lets talk.
and that is the last we heard of that strange off-worlder with that funny accent.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: 42 on January 16, 2008, 09:02:54 PM
remember the imperiums huge right? and world to world comunication is equally poor right? lots of us have copies of the primer the munitorium guide and forge world specs and codices and we meet and learn from better gamers, I have it the planet is a lost schola training commanders and inquisiters via a worldwide disguised system of training camps.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Gornak on January 16, 2008, 09:17:15 PM
Go mad from the horrors of the far future and the fact that everyone I ever knew was dead! Then mimic the culture of a local Ork warband paint my skin Green and recruit like minded individuals and create the first Uumie ork warband!
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: 42 on January 16, 2008, 09:20:17 PM
sorry mate diggas in gorkamorka beat you to it  :'(
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: ixlar on January 16, 2008, 09:30:13 PM
I think I would find the nearest pub, and drink myself sober just to make sure it wasn't a dream.  Then head out grab some frappin power armor, the largest bolter I could carry and find some corner of the galaxy that was fairly uninhabited.  I know I would be picked up by the inquisition.  The Eldar would cut me down long before I ever even saw them.  The Tau might be interesting to hang out with, but I think the stench of Kroot would make me seek other surroundings.  Orks, heh....I don't like being dinner.  Then there are the Necros.  Could you imagine hanging out with Arnold from T2 forever?  Makes me twitchy just thinking about it.  Then there are the Nids.  Have you hugged your salamander today?  Yeah, I think finding a unpopulated rock with O2 and some stuff I could hunt and forage for food would be very pleasant.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Gornak on January 16, 2008, 09:40:44 PM
sorry mate diggas in gorkamorka beat you to it  :'(

DOH! well there goes that plan, maybe some chaos legion will find my gibbering body and implant me into a dreadnought wreak havoc on the imperium.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 17, 2008, 03:21:31 AM
Rubbish technology like personal laser weapons, anti-gravity technology, and interstellar travel, you mean?

Yes, rubbish technology like interstellar travel using a bible and sacred oils, lasers that can barely penetrate heavy armour, and anti gravity technology that is deemed heretical by the holy order of Terra.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: 0verKill_235 on January 17, 2008, 03:30:21 AM
Do what I always do in a random act of trans-time and space derailment; open a taco stand.
A really good taco stand.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 17, 2008, 03:36:48 AM
Actually I think a nice spicy taco would go down well with those boring scribes and preachers. Plus you could probably become instantly rich if you serviced each and every soldier of the Imperium with a lovely big ol' taco. What a fantastic idea! I can see the money already!
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Jehan-Reznor on January 17, 2008, 03:46:30 AM
The emperors Taco? only a true believer can stand its spicyness.
well maybe open a lapdance joint with esher females
"what are you Looking at you pathatic excuse for a man!" ;D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on January 17, 2008, 05:13:27 AM
Rubbish technology like personal laser weapons, anti-gravity technology, and interstellar travel, you mean?

Yes, rubbish technology like interstellar travel using a bible and sacred oils, lasers that can barely penetrate heavy armour, and anti gravity technology that is deemed heretical by the holy order of Terra.

Excuse me?

Regarding the lasgun, what you're failing to remember is that it's an assault rifle, a basic infantry weapon. It's not designed to blow holes in tanks, that's what the lascannon's for. It's designed to a be a rugged, reliable piece of kit, easy to use and manufacture. It's pretty much perfect, in fact, for what it's designed for.

If anti-grav technology is heretical, why are aircars common on many Imperial worlds, not to mention Astartes Landspeeders?

I will give you prayers to the Machine Spirit, but it's hardly a massive inconvenience in any case.

Besides, name any of those that we do better now.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Windswept on January 17, 2008, 10:52:01 AM
Id seek out a cuturally dynamic society and blend in cuz as far as i can tell, me hiding in the imperium would be rather hard to do as there doesnt seem to be many black people in the 41st millenium... ;)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Benis on January 17, 2008, 02:59:50 PM
Go mad from the horrors of the far future and the fact that everyone I ever knew was dead! Then mimic the culture of a local Ork warband paint my skin Green and recruit like minded individuals and create the first Uumie ork warband!

The second one; remember Digganobz!

I wonder how long people with such clear knowledge of both the star child, Eldar, Ordo hereticus and the likes would actually survive in the 41st millennium. I think being silent about any actual knowledge might be a great survival trait amongst any time/dimension-travelling 40kO members...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Kiefatar on January 17, 2008, 03:16:54 PM
I'd find a nice little planet close to terra, start a company making a minature boardgame based on the struggles of 21st century Earth. Name it Warhammer 2.1K.

Either that or try and become a Titan Legio captain, those things look fun :).
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Fugitive on January 17, 2008, 08:52:19 PM
Id seek out a cuturally dynamic society and blend in cuz as far as i can tell, me hiding in the imperium would be rather hard to do as there doesnt seem to be many black people in the 41st millenium... ;)

lol :D

In The Grim Dark Future There Is Only... a buch of white dudes.  ???
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 17, 2008, 10:06:30 PM
Nocturne and Glavia. There, two different planets with dark-skinned natives.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: *Nosferatu* on January 17, 2008, 10:08:51 PM
I personally would take a far more realistic approach.

Find a nice farm girl, settle down, and pray the draft never comes.  :P
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Alexander's Son on January 17, 2008, 10:14:17 PM
I personally would take a far more realistic approach.

Find a nice farm girl, settle down, and pray the draft never comes.  :P

 That sounds like a bullet proof plan Nosferatu!  ;)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Bumbles on January 18, 2008, 05:42:14 AM
I set myself up as an author, and produce such insights into the past of Terra, as "A Tale of Two Cities" with the Emperor leading the valliant defence of the nobilities against the hordes of chaos corrupted old grannies.

Or a series of murder mysteries, where the Emperor, in a guise of a kindly old Belgian extols the virtues of "the little grey cells" and solves crimes.


Part devotional literature, part devious money making exercise.
Possibly heretical.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 18, 2008, 05:52:04 AM
Rubbish technology like personal laser weapons, anti-gravity technology, and interstellar travel, you mean?

Yes, rubbish technology like interstellar travel using a bible and sacred oils, lasers that can barely penetrate heavy armour, and anti gravity technology that is deemed heretical by the holy order of Terra.

Excuse me?

Regarding the lasgun, what you're failing to remember is that it's an assault rifle, a basic infantry weapon. It's not designed to blow holes in tanks, that's what the lascannon's for. It's designed to a be a rugged, reliable piece of kit, easy to use and manufacture. It's pretty much perfect, in fact, for what it's designed for.

If anti-grav technology is heretical, why are aircars common on many Imperial worlds, not to mention Astartes Landspeeders?

I will give you prayers to the Machine Spirit, but it's hardly a massive inconvenience in any case.

Besides, name any of those that we do better now.

Ok, sorry... you win. But I swear they said that speederbike hover technology was heretical or summat...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: nurgle5 on January 18, 2008, 09:18:17 AM
i would write inspiring novels to show the masses good always beats evil, no matter how impossible.Then i'd be invited to social dinners and have a conversation like:"....Yes, I'm glad you liked my latest, Lord of the Rings and did you enjoy Othello and my other plays?......Indeed, I intend to make a series of new films, like my current WIP: Dirty Harry...." :P ;) :D 8).

Then I will become head of the Machine cult of Mars because i am the only man in the galaxy who understands how plugs and electricity works. Then under my supervision i will build the most powerful army in history(Robo-Ninjas with Guns for eyes, ears, hands, feet, noses and hair), build a time travel device, go back in time and begin my conquest of the galaxy in 2009.

Then at the climax of my power, i will kill George Lucas for ruining star wars :D :D.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Siegfried on January 18, 2008, 12:02:20 PM
There would be many possibilities.

Odds are, I'd try to land an accounting sort of desk job or something like that and try to live a peaceful life but odds are (Murphy's law) wherever I would end up would eventually be attacked by an Ork Waghhh!, Tyranid Fleet, Chaos Raid, etc. Any sort of nasty outcome.

However, I remember reading fluffwise that the Inquisition hasn't been able to crack the Adeptus' language. (Binary) So potentially I could explain binary to them in exchange for some fancy things :3 (Goodies and such).

Not to mention all the fluff and information from all of my Black Library novels and other things, haha. I have a feeling I'd end up getting a Bold round through the head though for "heretical" knowlege.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: ixlar on January 18, 2008, 12:43:02 PM
Then at the climax of my power, i will kill George Lucas for ruining star wars :D :D.

While your at it.  Please kill the designers, artists, and voice actor that worked on Jar Jar Binks.  If I could I would machete that memory out of my brain.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: CheesyRobMan on January 18, 2008, 02:23:47 PM
Thunderbolt pilot.

With a red-hot mechanic girlfriend back in the hangar who happens to be an exact genetic clone of Kaylee from Firefly.  ;D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: legio mortis on January 18, 2008, 05:49:54 PM
However, I remember reading fluffwise that the Inquisition hasn't been able to crack the Adeptus' language. (Binary) So potentially I could explain binary to them in exchange for some fancy things :3 (Goodies and such).
That was a tongue in cheek joke made in the Cain books, not to be taken seriously.

Me, I'd live my life and maybe start up a business or two, depending on where I live.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Pulp Hero on January 18, 2008, 10:56:44 PM
Design and package various varnishes and sell them to the Astartes to keep their armor's paint job pristine. ;)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Wertyork on January 19, 2008, 01:53:15 AM
I'd try to start a life somehow if i was on a nice world. Otherwise id join the Imperial Guard and go and travel eveywhere... well actually probably only one other planet before getting obliterated in a huge cool as explosion that i created by detonating a traitor titan and getting a huge city named after me  :D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: DJBtod on January 19, 2008, 10:46:00 AM
I would paint myself green and try to join the ranks of the orks as a trukk driver or gunner. Who knows, I might fool them!

~dan
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Sergant Alexi on January 19, 2008, 10:47:17 AM
With a red-hot mechanic girlfriend back in the hangar who happens to be an exact genetic clone of Kaylee from Firefly.  ;D

yer you know whats right you got the right idea
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Meatshield on January 20, 2008, 01:42:53 AM
If I appeared on some random planet, I would:

1. Settle down as a farmer on an agri world

2. If possible I'd join the adeptus mechanicus as Skitarii, first having my brain lobotomized so I can't feel pain, and then tour the galaxy

3. Invent a popular table top strategy game and sell overpriced yet oh so addicting products  :D

4. Arrive on squat world and then tell them they have been discontinued. In the aftermath of all the squats screaming and dieing as they vaporise into non-existence, I take over their planet and live in their bastions a bit cramped from the low ceilings.

What if a bunch of the 40k online members appeared in the 40k universe together?

   

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Irandrura on January 20, 2008, 05:52:51 AM
What if a bunch of the 40k online members appeared in the 40k universe together?

We never know.

Think about it. I don't know what any of you look like, nor do I know many of your real names. If we all get teleported over, how, exactly, do I identify the rest of you as 40kO members? I don't know about you, but when I meet people, I don't introduce myself by saying I'm a 40kO member.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Mr Bate on January 20, 2008, 06:21:51 AM
Well If that did happen to me I would show some psychic potential and join a church to show my unwavering faith in the Emperor and hopefully be spotted by the inquisition so that I can become a grey knight... That would be the coolest thing ever. ;D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: nurgle5 on January 20, 2008, 06:38:01 AM
Quote
While your at it.  Please kill the designers, artists, and voice actor that worked on Jar Jar Binks.  If I could I would machete that memory out of my brain
"Avec Pleasure". Consider it done ;D.

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: CherryMan on January 24, 2008, 08:44:59 PM
I have had a seriously crazy dream about this thing as op wrote in this post.. I awoke in the 40k universe... and by being a gamer of 10 years in to the hobby makes one remember fluff and 40k story. Thus i found myself at the hands of a Inquisitor drawing information from me... for food and shelter that is... it all ended in a great orgy with catachan chicks and dark eldar babes... ::) .... like it does all the time in my dreams for some reason  ;D hahaha
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Wolf_Blade on January 24, 2008, 10:16:39 PM
I would join the Tau Empire and work on weapon research and development with the earth cast scientists. That or join them and be part of an exploration team. Better yet, Figure out how the Aun' control them and take over the entire empire as thier leader  ;D.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Adama on January 24, 2008, 10:50:35 PM
With a red-hot mechanic girlfriend back in the hangar who happens to be an exact genetic clone of Kaylee from Firefly.  ;D

yer you know whats right you got the right idea

Seconded, my thoughts exactly. ;D
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Indro Tyr on January 24, 2008, 10:57:23 PM
I'd probably join the Imperial Guard.  Travel to far off places.  Meet exotic aliens.  And kill them.   ;D

The Emperor Protects.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on January 25, 2008, 03:17:05 AM
What fails to amuse me about the imperial guard is the fact that you rarely ever get to stop off on another imperial planet and sample some of the females there. Now if only the imps became allied with the Eldar...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Alexander's Son on January 25, 2008, 10:38:25 AM
I have had a seriously crazy dream about this thing as op wrote in this post.. I awoke in the 40k universe... and by being a gamer of 10 years in to the hobby makes one remember fluff and 40k story. Thus i found myself at the hands of a Inquisitor drawing information from me... for food and shelter that is... it all ended in a great orgy with catachan chicks and dark eldar babes... ::) .... like it does all the time in my dreams for some reason  ;D hahaha

 Nahhh... I wouldn't worry if I were you... Sometimes I have the same dreams but without the dark eldar babes... I can't stand too much pain  ;)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Boris Grevane on January 26, 2008, 01:05:54 AM
First off.

Join up with a rogue trader and his crew. That is the REAL way to see the galaxy. Then give Axe body spray to all the Aun of the Tau and watch as the smell totally blocks the pheremones they excrete and the entire empire collapses into anarchy.

Ahh...deodorant...
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Baldemyr on January 30, 2008, 03:28:29 PM
If we got to chose-it would definately be a Space Wolf or Ultramarine or Grey Knight and give my life in the service of the species-not some bullamphetamine parrot little war over resources or territory(the history of our race).

  If I didnt have the choice...Rogue trader for sure-hire on as a bodyguard or something.  I have a bit of military training and general competence...  I would want to see the universe...I would want watch the Harlequin dance their past and Imperial Hammer slam down on Chaos raiders...   Maybe one day work into an Inquisitors band or Captain of my own trading vessel/liscence
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Theola on January 30, 2008, 07:35:52 PM
Hmm...  if I had a choice, I think it would be very cool to be trained as a Callidus Assassin, but I'm not sure how they get picked for service.  I would get to do all kinds of neat infiltration missions.  I'm not too much of a rank-and-file army soldier type person, so this way I could still serve the Emperor and have the freedom to venture off on my own.  I think a mission I'd really like to do is infiltrate an ork warcamp, assassinate the warboss and take his place.  Then I could order da boyz around and hopefully get them to focus on fighting humanity's enemies for a while, instead of getting all choppy on some peaceful civilian worlds.  Ideally I'd send them off to take out some tyranids, they seem to be the biggest menace.

If I'm just plopped on some random human world, I'd prefer to keep my head low and hope I don't get drafted into the army.  Maybe I'll quietly serve the Emperor on a nice farm somewhere, or file administrative papers for a big company in the city.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Janek Sunber on March 10, 2008, 04:35:20 AM
Ok, firstly... you don't train as a Callidus Assassin, you get handpicked, and conditioned, trained, and schooled from the age of 6 months old or something :P

And secondly... intergalactic sports star? I didn't know the imperium had those :O As a genuine question... does anyone here think that the nobles of Terra would sit back, watching their TV (or whatever), being tended to by pleasure slaves, catching the latest headlines on Blood Bowl?
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: the_FALLEN_one on March 10, 2008, 04:40:55 AM
Yes well i do....  ::) but seriously intergalactic sports would be the next best thing to watching the news... haha
Blood Bowl = the shiznit

Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Lord Janyx on March 10, 2008, 06:44:39 AM
With a red-hot mechanic girlfriend back in the hangar who happens to be an exact genetic clone of Kaylee from Firefly.  ;D

yer you know whats right you got the right idea

Seconded, my thoughts exactly. ;D


I'm with you guys! Can we all get Kaylee clones?

(https://www.40konline.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fiz4u.net%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2007%2F11%2FKaylee21.jpg&hash=11e61c16068bb336d85de8646ecec003f218e5ab)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on March 10, 2008, 04:09:50 PM
I don't think anyone would be watching Blood Bowl, it's a Fantasy game. But frequent mention is made of 'Scrumball' in the Ciaphas Cain novels, which we can assume is some form of rugby given the inclusion of 'scrum' in the name. It's implied that each planet in a sector has a team that competes in inter-planetary, and possibly inter-system games.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Gornon on March 10, 2008, 04:33:28 PM
Quote
It's implied that each planet in a sector has a team that competes in inter-planetary, and possibly inter-system games.
Though it never matters because the Sisters always win since their goal is to maim the other players and not to score points.  Kick to the jewels backed up by Hand of the Emperor (+2 strength) :-X
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on March 10, 2008, 04:42:29 PM
He was talking about the Sororitas Novitiates participating in the league at the Schola Progenium in that particular passage. I stongly doubt that the actual Adepta Sororitas maintains a scrumball team.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Gornon on March 10, 2008, 04:47:57 PM
I know, just having some fun.  8)
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Heretek on March 10, 2008, 05:08:03 PM
Fun has no place in a serious debate about what we would do if we were suddenly transported thousands of years in the future to a fantasy universe.
Title: Re: If you suddenly found yourself in the 40K universe..
Post by: Grand Master Lomandalis on March 12, 2008, 01:56:29 AM
you guys do realise that the last time this thread had any post was back on jan 30th?  which is back on page three!

Please for gods sake, let dead thread RIP